wordinista: (In vacant or in pensive mood)
There are some months, I suppose, that are emotional roller-coasters simply by virtue of being fraught with holiday stress and obligations. I've been walking around all day with this ball of tension in my chest, constantly feeling as if I'm on the verge of tears. I haven't felt this way in quite some time, and while I was perfectly aware of a few stressors present in my life, I was fairly certain nothing going on warranted this level of anxiety.   Just the other day I was squeeing over Darwin's 3rd birthday and gushing over his puppy pictures.

So I walked the dogs, and grew ever-annoyed with Florida's pathetic excuse for winter weather, returning home carrying the fleece I'd left wearing.  I fed the beasts and started my Monday tidying/cleaning routine.  I was dusting the living room when I saw it -- the nondescript little metal box that resides behind the television. It's Bronte's box: it holds her cremains, and it lives behind the TV because that was her favorite place to curl up while at the same time the ONLY place she wasn't allowed to curl up. (Except toward the end, when Bronte was allowed to do whatever Bronte pleased.)

I... promptly burst into tears.  I've cried a few times today, and I suspect there will be flare-ups throughout the month.

There's also vague work-related angst, as it would appear that George won't be getting a year-end bonus, since Boss has said nothing either way about bonuses -- despite the fact that Boss told George if they landed Big Name Client (which they did), he could expect to see a nice bonus at the end of the year.  Sigh. 

So right now I feel a little empty and sore and cynical inside, and it... really kind of sucks.

Tell me something happy.
wordinista: (Dreaming Dragons)
bronte in a box
wordinista: (Flames)
 ...I really, really love it when a hunch works out.

I got the holiday Drs. Foster and Smith catalog this weekend, which is, for those not in the know, a pet catalog.  Everything you could ever want or need for your pet in one handy-dandy catalog.  (Personally, I prefer Jeffers Pets, but I digress.)  As I was thumbing through, I saw this canned kitten... "formula," basically, that you give to kittens if they can't get mother's milk or whatever.  I also noticed that it was recommended for lactating and convalescing cats.  And I thought, hey, I kinda have one of those.  Sort of.  If "convalescing" = "on death's door."

So, I went down to Petsmart and picked up a can.  Because, really, at this point, WHY NOT?  She's... kind of on borrowed time at this point, and I'm getting desperate to put weight back on her.

Bronte. Loves it.  

I put it down, and she made a BEELINE for the dish, nearly shoving Kisa (now lovingly referred to as "Fat Ass") out of the way, and going to TOWN on that stuff.  

So, Bronte got a can of sweet, sweet kittymilk, and Kisa... got a bag of Nutro Natural Choice Indoor Cat Formula Weight Management kibble.


I expect she'll try to smother me in my sleep before the week is out.
wordinista: (Up to no good)
There is no one else -- no one else -- with whom I could have a conversation including the following three things at the same time:

"Bloodletting," by Concrete Blonde.

"The Teddy Bears Picnic"


The vampire Pomeranian from Blade Trinity.

Cut for HILARITY. (And isn't that a nice change?) )
Bunneh: .asdjlfka;sdla;lsjdf;alskdjf
Evvie: :D?
Evvie: a picnic OF YOUR BLOOD
Bunneh: that image. is now. burned. in my mind.
Evvie: okay, I can't make myself laugh or they'll think I've lost my mind back here.:Dbd
Evvie: now I'm thinking of the vamp Pom from Blade Trinity
Evvie: XD must... not... write... lyrics
Bunneh: ...........
Evvie: XD
"If you go down to the woods today, you're in for a big surprise/ if you go down to the woods today, you'd better go in disguise"
"For every bear that ever there was/ Is gathered there for certain because/ Tonight's the night vampire bears have a picniiiiIIIIIIEEEEEEEEERGH"
Bunneh: ;FA;LSDK <3
Evvie: [is giggling again]

Also, just because it is by far the best news I have today: I saw Bronte EATING today. \o/
wordinista: (Happy Asta)

I called to tell them about all the trouble I've had finding Bronte's meds, and they called around and FOUND A PHARMACY THAT DOESN'T SUCK.  It's not exactly close to home (it's a smallish pharmacy near the hospital), but they have the meds, and the prescription can be picked up in half an hour.


Also, homework is done before class for once.  \o\

PS:  I'd wanted to do the holiday card thang last year, but came down with the plague (which effectively halted all plans for holiday baking as well).  So, I have a huge box of awesome cards -- of which I used exactly none last year -- so expect a screened post asking for addresses and such.
wordinista: (Year of the Cat)
Well, she lost another pound (down to 6.5 lbs now), and her PCV value is about 7%, which is considered to be fatal levels.  However, her personality is still very much in place, and she's eating and drinking, so the plan is to keep her on meds and as comfortable as possible for the time she has left.  She will likely become weaker -- to the point where she won't have any interest in eating or drinking.  At that point, we're going to have to bring her in for the last time.  But like I said, she's still active (in that she's walking around and getting into trouble), and still demanding attention, so hopefully that day is a long way off.

This wasn't an easy decision to come to, but we both feel it's the right decision.  She's not in any pain, she's just... weak.

The pharmacy, however, is being... you know what?  There aren't words for what they're being.  I've been having a devil of a time filling the cytoxin prescription Bronte needs (in addition to her Prednisone, which I can get from the vet clinic's pharmacy).  Every single time I've dropped the prescription off, they've been all, "Okay! You can pick it up in two hours!"  Then I go back:  "We're sorry, this is out of stock.  It'll be in in a few days!"  I go back a few days later: "We're sorry, this is out of stock."  WHAT.  JUST.  WHAT.  WTF, PEOPLE.  And it doesn't matter if they call the other Walgreens in the area -- NONE OF THEM HAVE THIS MEDICATION.  I was complaining about this to Dr. Young recently, and he said the next time it happened to call the clinic and THEY'D call the pharmacy to impress upon them the importance of keeping DRUGS IN STOCK.


Time flies

Oct. 31st, 2007 09:54 am
wordinista: (Sensitive Pisces credit to colorfilter)
Holy crud, I have not updated this thing in a month.  Wow, that's a special kind of fail.

Of course, much of the past month was spent fretting over my Strategic Management course.  Which is now over, and in which I got a shiny B, so I'm pretty relieved about that.  My final course in the program is a business writing elective, and I'm taking that now (courses last eight weeks instead of sixteen).  So things should be a little less insane.

Speaking of less insane, or rather the opposite of less insane, I'm going to apply to UCF's Texts and Technology PhD program.  The application process has been a niiiiightmare because my GRE scores are over five years old, and the department head said she could waive the five-year limit if I could produce an official copy of my scores.  Alas, ETS does not hold on to scores that long, UCF mysteriously lost the official copy I had sent to them when I took the stupid thing in the first place, and GWU doesn't keep hard copes.  I'm MILDLY annoyed with the program over this, because I could have signed up to take the GRE again, but instead wasted time running around on a wild goose chase. 

Bronte... is not doing well.  At this point, I think George and I have agreed to keep her on her meds and keep her comfortable for as long as she's with us.  She isn't in any pain, and she's eating and drinking, but she's lost a LOT of weight, and her coat is very raggedy.  I need to make a vet appointment to let him know that we're just going to keep the meds up and keep her comfy. 

Ah, so that's why I haven't updated in a month.  Whining about school and depressing news about my cat.  Well then.  At least I know now.


Sep. 26th, 2007 08:27 am
wordinista: (Chibi Crusnik)
Hokay, so. I got the call from the vet yesterday, and Bronte's levels were holding steady at 8%, which... isn't good but isn't horrible either. I mean, that's still a really bad level for her red blood cell count to be at, but she's holding steady there, which... isn't horrible. Our choices at this point are to look into a second transfusion, keep her on the meds for a few more weeks and see if her levels increase, or Dr. Young said he could get us set up with a specialist. I have a feeling a specialist is going to tell us she needs a second transfusion, but I may be wrong about that.

What does this mean? This means no Difficult Decisions need to be made immediately. I'm thinking we may take her to a feline specialist, even though I'm almost certain a specialist is going to recommend a transfusion. We will probably do a second transfusion if I can get an extension on our Care Credit account.

Just in case anyone was wondering, Bronte IS the best cat in the world. So there. ;)

PS:  You guys are made of awesome. 

PPS:  In other noteworthy news, I got a 98 on my midterm for Strategic Management! \o/
wordinista: (hide my tears)
Took Bronte to the vet's today. They took more blood and will call this afternoon. We'll see what happens after that.

I have had one good cry already. Might make it two.

Please, guys. Tell me something happy. A funny story, a silly drabble, a joke, something. I need to get the positive vibes going, because I'm kind of tired of crying.
wordinista: (cast me gently into morning)
Not the most auspicious start to a week.

Bronte's red blood cell count is back down to 8%. We're upping her prednisone dosage and the doc wants to re-check her in two weeks, at which point, if she hasn't improved, we have to make the decision between another transfusion and euthanasia.

I think I want to go back to bed now.
wordinista: (Death N' Dream)
I haven't been able to update my journal for almost a goddamn week.  WTF, LJ.

Bronte had a vet appointment today -- very little change from last week, if any. She put on a tenth of a pound, and her PVC values are the same.  She's on the same meds for another month, after which point Dr. Young will probably alter the dosage.

Other stuff going on, but I can't think of it at the moment.  Have been getting the itch to write again, which is definitely good, as I simply haven't felt like writing anything for months.  Maybe I'll even tackle that drabble meme from a million years ago...


May. 15th, 2007 10:42 am
wordinista: (DEMON CAT!)
Bronte had a vet appointment this morning, and her PCV value is up to 13% (from 8% at her last appointment two weeks ago).  Dr. Young wants to keep her on the meds (same dosage, same everything) for another three weeks.  He said he'd also like to see her put on a little weight, so I'm off to Petsmart today to get some kibble for her (they're out) and some high-calorie nutritional supplement.  Dr. Young said he'd normally recommend putting the cat on kitten food during a period like this, but Kisa is already bulking up, we don't need her turning into a total lard-butt.

Darwin continues to be Bronte's protector.  It's socute.

My horoscope said I'd be angry today, but so far, that's totally NOT working out to be the case! 
wordinista: (Bunneh has had quite enough kthx)
Okay, so maybe I'm overstating things a bit.

Bronte's PCV levels are down to 7%.  Or, as I've taken to saying, "Seven-fucking-percent."  I am currently kicking myself for not getting her in for her follow-up sooner.

She's now had an injection of prednisone, a new bottle of prednisone, and a prescription for cytoxin getting filled at the pharmacy as we speak.  The vet doesn't want to rush her in for another transfusion because with every transfusion, the body has more trouble fighting antibodies, and it's less effective each time you try.  (Let's not even mention the part where I have no idea how we'd be able to afford another transfusion.)  SO.  She's on meds for two weeks, and then goes in to see the doc on the first.

We are right back at square one.  I don't like square one.  It kind of sucks.

The good news, if we can say that there's good news to be had, is that her spleen is enlarged, which means her body is trying to produce red blood cells.  She's also only lost a half a pound of weight.

Damn it.
wordinista: (cast me gently into morning)
Well, the interview Wednesday went very well.  It... actually went better than even I'd hoped, including things like, "We love your resume,"  "We're very impressed by your resume," and other blush-inducing things.  I don't know when I'll hear anything, but they want to see me teach, see how I'll handle a high school class, so I'm currently in the pool of substitutes and will get a call the very next time they need a sub in the Upper School (the high school, basically -- the school itself has a Lower School, Middle School, and Upper School).  I have a good feeling, but am trying not to get too excited, because that happens to me a lot -- I get excited, get my hopes up, and then something happens and I'm inconsolable for weeks.  So.  Mostly I'm hanging back with a wait and see attitude.

Now the bad news.  It appears Bronte is having a bit of a relapse.  I made an appointment with the vet for tomorrow (but her regular vet is gone all this week, curses), and I'm going to suggest putting her back on the low-level chemo drug and prednisone, and hopefully she hasn't relapsed to the point where we'll have to think about another transfusion, because mygod, I don't think our bank account could handle that.  I think we caught it soon enough, though, because it was just in the space of a week that we started noticing a change in her behavior.  Sometimes I wonder if Darwin didn't sense it sooner, because he's been awfully clingy around Bronte lately.  Even now, both of them are under my desk, together, sleeping.  Bronte is on a low shelf and Darwin's curled up by my feet.  If I didn't know it'd disturb them both, I'd get the camera and take a picture.

I kind of feel like her relapse is my fault.  I knew I needed to make a follow-up appointment for her.  I knew it.  But we also had to get Darwin in for his booster shots, and I had every intention of making her follow-up appointment for two weeks after Darwin's, but didn't, and it was stupid and irresponsible of me, and... yeah, not in a very good place right now.  As I'm sure you can imagine.

At the very least, if I get hired by the school, there will be more disposable income with which to funnel into our "kids," and I won't have to worry about scheduling vet appointments on weeks we get paid.

Cross your fingers for me, guys.
wordinista: (Momiji Hope)
Bronte went to see Dr. Young today, after I had to reschedule three separate times (stupid flu).

First bit of good news:  She gained a pound!  Yes, Chunky Puff is on her way back to being worthy of her nickname, weighing in at 9.2 lbs.

Second bit of good news:  Her PCV count is up to 26.5%!!!  The last time she got her blood checked, she was at around 17%, which was still kind of low, but this is very, very good news.  The doc would like to see her go up a bit more -- into the 30s, I think -- but wants to start cutting back on her dosages and eventually phase out the meds completely.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!  *dances like a mad thing*

Best, best, BEST belated Christmas present EVAR.

So, which one of you was responsible for making #1 look like it's going to come true, eh?
wordinista: (Momiji Hope)
Bronte went in for a follow-up yesterday and got to see Dr. Young again, who apologized for being away when everything went directly to hell in a handbasket.  He was totally up on her file when we went in, which was a welcome change from the fifty-billion other vets we saw while he was out of town.  He took a little blood to check her PCV levels, and Bronte and I were in and out in twenty minutes.

He called back with results while I was working last night, and I tried listening to the voicemail on my way home, but my battery started dying. Blargh.


Her PCV level is at about 15%, which isn't great, but it's the same as it was when they discharged her from the emergency clinic, so if nothing else, her body isn't attacking the new blood.  She's stable for the nonce, and that makes me happy.  He also wanted to make sure I understood that she hasn't been on the new medication long enough for it to make any significant change in her condition, and the same went for the prednisone increase -- it's only been a week, and there's usually about a week or ten days' worth of lag time.

So!  She goes in again in two weeks to get more blood taken and we'll see where things take us from there. :)
wordinista: (Niamh's Gure-san!  More creds to Ly)

First off -- thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who expressed concern over Bronte.  I've been pretty emotional the past few weeks, and a few of your replies brought me to tears, and I just couldn't think of anything to say.  Thank you.   Your comments and virtual hugs and well-wishes and everything were such a... a balm, I guess.  It takes something really bad in Real Life to remind us just how wonderful such a community of friends can be.

*glomps [livejournal.com profile] tatertott, especially*  We got your card, sweetie.  Thank you. 

Anyway.  Updatey stuff.  Enough with the mush, right? ;) 

Adventures in pharmacology! )

Bronte update (pictures under the cut)... )

This Bunneh is a workin' Bunneh! )


Nov. 2nd, 2006 12:51 pm
wordinista: (Momiji Hope)

I just got a call from the vet's office (well, I didn't just get the call, because I made a few phone calls after that), and they told me that the FeLV test came back absolutely, positively negative.


Evidently, the anemia is not non-regenerative.  She's trying very hard to make red blood cells, but her immune system is just going crazy attacking them, so the bloodwork looked non-regenerative, if that makes sense.  I believe he said "hemolytic anemia," but cannot recall off the top of my head.  He's stopping the doxycycline, and wants to increase her prednisone dosage, and he's putting her on another immune-suppressing med -- a steroid (the name of which escapes me at the moment -- basically it's something they give to organ transplant patients to suppress the immune system so it doesn't attack the new organ).

And here's the really good news:  I asked the vet if this was something she was going to have to live with for the rest of her life, or if this was something she could theoretically recover from.  He said that he didn't want to make any promises, but that it was definitely within the realm of possibility that Bronte could make a full recovery, and eventually go off the meds.

If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go hug my kitty now.


wordinista: (Default)

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